Sx so vs sx sp

Sx so vs sx sp DEFAULT

Myers Briggs [MBTI]

There are 6 stackings: SP/SO, SP/SX, SO/SP, SO/SX, SX/SP, and SX/SO. Below are descriptions of the six stackings, but these are meant as general, across-the-board summaries of the tone or concerns of each stacking. However, instincts are always combined with our enneagram type which changes the tone or is relative to the type.

Self-Preservation dominant, Social 2nd, Sexual blindspot (SP/SO)

> Mindset: "If I can maintain position and inclusion in the group/world, I can make sure of and keep my orderly and pleasing lifestyle." (May try to be just appealing and connected with groups enough for everyone to get out of their hair)

> Private, reserved, serious, want to make useful connection that support their goals of attaining material security

> Loyalty is important

> Can lack interpersonal warmth, can sometimes seem selfish

> Drawn to groups with likeminded individuals

> Dress in inconspicuous appropriate fashion to match their status in life

> Can have direct blunt communication style

> Archetypes: The Land Surveyor, farmer, patriot, businessman

> Missing SX water/fire, have a sober quality, not led down the road of fantastical/addictive, arid

> Emotionally difficult to reach with regards to self-revelation and exchanges around theirs and others’ personal messy underbellies

> Lack of psychological nudity

> Less likely to flash their eccentricities, not susceptible to impractical highs

> Pragmatic, looking for resources/political advantage

> Less likely to mark the environment as their own

> Tend towards the patriotic/nationalistic exclusive of the personal, native land SP combines with social mores SO, righteousness and loyalty to higher principals, history, social theme

> Physical space SP is subject of communal protective drive SO

> Has a sense for being appropriate in social situations. Protects themselves through following and insisting upon civility, general politeness, or professional norms. Doesn't modulate their personal energy widely. Keeps even, consistent, and sturdy. Has a tracking instinct for the underbellies ('shadowside') of society and governments with respect to finance and resource mismanagement. What they take in through their senses gets filtered through cynicism. Savers, collectors, people who find ways to make contributions to (or oppose) their community without being conspicuous or to have genuinely transgressed. Has a more refined sense of implementing reverse crowd psychology than SP/SX.

Self-Preservation dominant, Sexual 2nd, Social blindspot (SP/SX)

> Mindset: "I can have merging/intensity without having to leave my orderly & pleasing lifestyle." (imagination, safe people and relationships, when the safety of these are challenged they withdraw)

> Earthy, mysterious, quietly intense, seem oblivious to the greater social world around them, favour personal interests

> Slow to commit, but when they do it is a life commitment to establish an impermeable bond

> Can attach to others at a root level in contrast to their surface formality

> Sanctuary of home, decorate spaces to reflect their taste/depth

> Want to live in secure comfortable environment where they can pursue their private interests in depth

> Archetypes: The Grave Digger, pirate, voodoo fetishist

> Missing Social, fresh air/sunlight

> Shrouded/hooded quality, cave dweller

> Can be oblivious to the collective good

> Communications are intimate, personal, no aura of the collective

> Friend-of-the-dark, non-judgemental with people’s underbellies/corruption

> The elements as metaphor: Downward death, decay/destruction, undertow, carcasses recycling into earth fertilizing

> Molten fire SX in earth’s core SP, volcanic, threat of eruption

> Psychic nudity/revelation threatens the SP/SX with self-destruction, or at least social self-destruction, which is all part of the distilling process toward the desired one-to-one bond.

Social dominant, Self-Preservation 2nd, Sexual blindspot (SO/SP)

> Mindset: "If I can establish an orderly and pleasing lifestyle, I can make sure of and keep improving my position and inclusion in the group/world."

> Comfortable in group settings, can be formal/awkward in one on one relations

> Natural political type, affiliate with groups/theories that best defend their social/material interests

> Can lack warmth and individual identity, could lead to problems forming relationships outside of a shared social interest

> Want to attain status within their social sphere

> Archetypes: The Bishop, witch hunter, ethnic cleanser, culture warrior

> Missing SX water/fire, has a sober quality, not led down the road of fantastical/addictive, arid

> Emotionally difficult to reach with regards to self-revelation and exchanges around theirs and others’ personal messy underbellies

> Lack of psychological nudity

> Less likely to flash their eccentricities, not susceptible to impractical highs

> Pragmatic, looking for resources/political advantage

> Less likely to mark the environment as their own

> Tend towards the patriotic/nationalistic exclusive of the personal, native land SP combines with social mores SO, righteousness and loyalty to higher principals, history, social theme

> Physical space SP is subject of communal protective drive SO

> SO/SP seems to want to "change the earth with the voice". (Earth=SP, Voice=air=SO.) And since SX is last, the interest is generally in pragmatic structural change. Regalness also comes through as a tone here. Air is high and mighty ("Putting on airs"). Has a dry deepness that can seem either warm, romantic, and resonant, or cold and cynical, depending on the mood and circumstance of the individual. With SX last, intimacy is an area of deficiency, and people of this stacking often struggle to some degree with maintaining romantic relationships. The central focus is on role within a group. The culture warrior

Social dominant, Sexual 2nd, Self-Preservation blindspot (SO/SX) "The Intense Appealer"

> Mindset: "If I can get close to people with merging/intensity, I can make sure of and keep improving my position and inclusion in the group/world."

> Has strong one to one social skills but can be uncomfortable in group settings

> Cultivate many relationships, involved when in the presence of someone they’re interested in, but have difficulty sustaining these bonds when they are apart

> Seem flightly/rootless, willing to adapt and mirror others to connect

> May be political, but is more pragmatic and less partisan than SO/SP

> May be attuned to pop culture or latest trend

> Aren’t as concerned with having roots on land or material items of significance Want to create lasting connections with those they are interested in, the best friend

> Archetypes: The Strolling Minstrel, regalia, jester, the mayor

> Missing SP earth, lacking the dull weight, stick-in-the-mud quality of earth

> Butterfly, shimmer and sparkle unsullied by dirt and seriousness/mundane concerns

> Breakup of the monotony of hardened routines, incapacitation/difficulty moving forward in certain areas in life

> Practical immaturity, nomadic, no roots

> Wide, ubiquitous presence, hard to grasp, up-in-the-air, wishy-washy, wide-

ranging passion and interest

> Inherent kind of intensity about others - engaging them, understanding them; seems to 'relax' among people, not necessarily engaging them just spending time with people for them is like being in a hot, relaxing bath

> Dangerously magnetic charisma, perfected, elegant social appearance & competence, ability to make everyone relax, often floats from group to group or person to person with grace and ease, feeling close to no one while inspiring others to feel close to them; selectivity within social sphere; inherent kind of social elegance makes for a pickier person

> Acute emotional perception and 'people awareness', they readily share these perceptions with others, so can make for spell-binding councelors, life-coaches, etc.The social world (i.e. culture, history, media) is asexual so, when stressed, the SO/SX can struggle to build romantic relationships. This can be confusing for other people because the intensity of intellectual and emotional connection i.e. friendship, may lend itself to romance but nothing happens

> The least sober stacking. SP imparts some grounding, so when it's last, it feels like there's not a place to plug into practicality. And SX/SO at least has some focused drive (even, perfectionism) from the SX-firstness.

> SO/SX is all about the narrative and symbiotic needs. Image story theater and, the story. Very clever and hyper-observant of others, can be constantly manipulative in an obsessive way, planing and working to gain what they want from others, networking on cruise control, happy to tell white lies and bend a story for a desired outcome. Honesty comes second to symbiotic needs. Skilled in the application of communication skills as a tool and charm and grace in a comforting way for people to relax and trust the interlace of the SO/SX. If one is compatible with the SO/SX in interests and shared values, they are one of the most insightful and interesting and entertaining people to converse with and truly care about other people and seek to share their understanding via gentle connection of mind and heart.

Sexual dominant, Self-Preservation 2nd, Social blindspot (SX/SP)

> Mindset: "If I can make (us) have an orderly & pleasing lifestyle, I can keep up and escalate all this merging/intensity."

> Internally conflicted, inconsistent behaviour SX blocked by SP, brooding, troubledIsolation vs. emerging

> Strictly personal outlook, not concerned with social consensus

> Searching for missing piece, soulmate, form a secret bond

> When stressed, severe sexual tensions may manifest as erratic behaviour

> Restless, torn between stable home and urge to wander/explore intensity

> Want the intensity of partner/pursuing personal interests with the stability and comfort of a home sanctuary

> Archetypes: The Alchemist, shaman, self-injurer, cutter, tattoo artist

> Missing Social, fresh air/sunlight, when you take away air you get death

> Shrouded/hooded quality, cave dweller

> Oblivious to the collective good

> Communications are intimate, personal, no aura of the collective

> Friend-of-the-dark, non-judgemental with people’s underbellies/corruption

> The elements as metaphor: Upward death, rebirth, metamorphosis, burned to death and born again from new elements

> Losing self to die in the other in upward peak of flame and ecstasy

> A lightning bolt captured in a bottle. The energy is always there but it's contained in a glass jar and only breaks free once in a while. The SX/SP is boxed in energy, self-contained, cutting, and focused. SX/SP types will often look angry even when they are not. There is a certain reality of emotion which they display that is due to their social obliviousness. Most SX's will be honest almost to a fault. SX/SP want to choose their friends wisely. A "with me or against me" attitude reminiscent of 6 and 8s. The least inhibited of all stackings. Cares less of what others think of them. The most likely to get into physical altercations, and may even enjoy fighting. Healthy SX/SP's will display a playful selfishness.

> SX/SP have a inner confidence which is not usually found in other stackings. However they may lack social confidence or just may not pay any attention to social rituals at all. Put a SX/SP in a busy bar and they will be confident in themselves. But make them sit at their parent-in-laws for a formal family dinner and you won't see that same confidence. It's inner confidence rather than social confidence of the SX/SO. May be very popular without knowing or putting emphasis on it, unlike SO types.

> SX/SP does create a kind of isolationary tendency though even in extroverted types, an in-their-own-world vibe, kinda oblivious sometimes. But ironically they can also be extremely insistent and aggressive on issues they feel strongly about, which they go on about in the SO realms in ways that will cause stronger SO's to cringe, it's so rough and undiplomatic. They can fall in love with their soapboxes. They can tune out of conversations, reacting suddenly when someone says something interesting, then snapping back to their inner focus whenever it gets boring. Also, making the odd crude joke, in bad taste. Or a faux pas, where they don't know it's the wrong thing to say until afterwards, or don't care.

> SX manifests as strong drives towards pleasure, new experiences, personal transformations, spontaneity, being provocative and in the spotlight, flaunting to impress, extravagance, and unrealistic romantic fantasies and whims. But SP counters with worries, fears, practical downers, erecting walls, a need to hide and be secretive, and needs to conserve time, space, and energy.

Sexual dominant, Social 2nd, Self-Preservation blindspot (SX/SO) "The Sensual Player"

> Mindset: "If I can maintain position and inclusion in the group/world, I can keep up and escalate all this merging/intensity."

> Exudes raw charisma and sexual energy

> Identify with what they’re involved with, become the symbol of its core essence

> Can test boundaries and not content with status quo

> Can have social/spiritual cause

> Exploit and redefine sexuality to reflect their own colourful understanding of it

> Pulled between intensity and episodes of peaceful convention

> Want the intensity of partner/pursuing social interests, use the social realm to get what they need, up and out in the world, oriented toward people

> Archetypes: The Chanteuse, comet, flamenco dancer, shooting star

> Missing SP earth, lacking the dull weight, stick-in-the-mud quality of earth

> Butterfly, shimmer and sparkle unsullied by dirt and seriousness/mundane concerns

> Breakup of the monotony of hardened routines, incapacitation/difficulty moving forward in certain areas in life

> Practical immaturity, nomadic, no roots

> SX/SO is the "social revolutionary" stacking, leaning more toward cultural change than political change, though the two are obviously not mutually exclusive (SO/SP seems like the bigger player in the area of socio-political/governmental change). With the SO instinct in second position, SX-first energy is more phallic, a concentrated cluster of nerves leaning forward (SX), poking at the collective emotional space (SO); introducing heat which causes agitation in social groups, probing and forcing psychological exposure. And without the self-protective 'pullback' from SP concerns, it's a "no holes barred" scenario. The SO mid-position means that the social arena is a "neutral pool" ripe for seduction and seizure and big ebbs-and-flows of attraction and repulsion from SX.  Depending on the enneatype, SP-lastness can make the SX/SO-person largely oblivious to the degree to which his revolution threatens his own survival. Thus, the person's subconscious attitude is 'full steam ahead'. Stick raw powerlines of SX-first into the electrically-conductive water of the social pool, and stagnant waters have no choice but to start poppin' and crackin'.

> Use of exhibitionism. Besides the use of literal (physical) exposure, difficult or unsettling types of psycho-emotional exposure proffer a charged vulnerability reminiscent of genital exposure (displaying what is sensitive) which has no choice but to be registered as 'sexual' in the subconscious of the observer. This then is a way to foist reactivity into the crowd.

> Energetic qualities associated with SX/SO: ripping, tearing, destroying, breaking, burning, disapproving, disobeying, dismissing, ridiculing, alienating, crowing, ranting, screaming, displaying, exposing, joining, embodying, asserting, confronting, changing, reinventing, transforming, breaking through, leaving behind, going overboard

Energies in the Stackings:

The instincts represent your needs and priorities. The types are more like your internal issues. Your own problems. The internal problems you focus on (the conflict between ego, superego and id). The variants, by contrast, focus on the outside world. The outside problems you focus on.

Therefore, the social type focuses on society as a whole, and… well… social problems. That is – your job, your school, whether you have homework to do, whether you don’t have homework to do, how well are you doing in life, how well are other people doing in life, how well are you doing in life compared to how other people are doing in life, your role, etc. It compells you to desire to interact with others, and focus on the interactions between you and others, as well as the interaction between you and… things even. It’s a thought that’s very… gear-like. Very… mechanic. There’s always movement. They are aware of also the interactions between others and others, and others and the environment as well as themselves and others and themselves and the environment. It’s being aware of interactions in general. How everything interacts with each other. That’s what makes it very gear-like. One gear affects another, and their aware of how they can harm and help this whole entire process (of interacting with others and stuff). When they lose someone, they feel that a gear was just lost. They can’t interact with it anymore, and it’s gone. That something’s missing (and they know what it is).

SX-firsts, on the other hand, aren’t as aware of the interactions between them and others and the environment, rather… their more aware of the chemistry. So while the so-firsts are more “mechanical”, the sx-firsts are more “chemical”. Focusing on SX-first issues involve: Am I close to my gf/bf? Am I close to my family? How much in common do we all have? Do I really like this thing? Am I attracted to it? Is that person attracted to that other person? etc. They’re more aware of the bonds and the chemistry between them and people, as well as environment, and other people and other people, as well as other people and the environment. They really like being close to their intimates, and are generally passionate about things. Likewise, they fear that those chemical bonds could be broken, and when they are, they are emotionally hurt. They feel literally separated, and ripped away from the other person or object.

Finally, SP-first issues revolve around: Am I healthy? Do I look good? How are my financial issues? How is that person’s financial issues? Am I hungry? etc. In other words, SP-firsts worry more about fitness. Fitness in general, of course, not necessarily just body fitness. Therefore, they worry more about how fit they are in their environment, as well as how fit other people are in their environment. They want to be fit. This represents more a potential energy, rather than mechanical and chemical energy. When someone leaves them… I guess perhaps they feel more unfit, since I’m sure they may rely on others to keep them fit. Though, its still more important for they themselves to be fit on their own.

SO/SX– Mechanical energy -> Chemical energy (-> = then)

Focus on the interaction of things, and how their “chemical energy” influences these interactions. They use their “chemical energy” to help them interact better. They seek a bond with everything they interact with.

SX/SO– Chemical energy -> Mechanical energy

Focus on the chemistry of things, and how their “mechanical energy” influences the chemistry between them and others. They may rely on interactions to help their “chemical bonds” remain stable (such as asking a friend for advice on the relationship, as well as interacting with the right objects to help the relationship remain stable).

SO/SP– Mechanical energy -> Potential energy

Focus on the interaction of things again, but then they also focus on their fitness, and how fit those interactions are. Use their fitness as a away of reinforcing the strength of the interactions as well (“I will do better at work if I am well-suited”).

SP/SO– Potential energy -> Mechanical energy

Focus on their fitness, while also focusing on the interaction of things. How those interactions affect their fitness. They may, for this reason, seem more business oriented. (“If I take that offer, it might help me more”).

SP/SX– Potential energy -> Chemical energy

Focus on their fitness, as well as the chemical bonds they’ve developed with people. They also focus on how those chemical bonds affect their fitness.

SX/SP– Chemical energy -> Potential energy

Focus on their chemical bonds, as well as fitness. Basically, the fitness of those chemical bonds, and what they can do to make them “fitter”.

Expressions:

Change depending on enneagram type

SP-last - messy, scattered

SO-last - dirty, uncouth

SX-last - clean, parched

SP/SO - bare and superficial

SX/SP - hardened and curled in

SO/SX - soft and sparkly

SP/SX - heavy and contained

SX/SO - ray of sunshine

SO/SP - smooth with a crust

Let's not dive in too deep down the bunny hole though

Oh Gru :hatching_chick:

Source : http://enneagramsubtypes.weebly.com/instinct-stackings.html

Sours: https://aminoapps.com/c/myers-briggs/page/item/instinctual-variants-stackings/reBe_PmuqIxkYX0KoL4anVml8qDvlq1

Thread: contrast of instinctual variants sx/so and sx/sp that I found

I really like BumblyJack's contrast of sx/so and sx/sp types hereHe describe my best friend and I so well in our behavior and in how I feel.


Note: These are relative comparisons and they are exaggerated for comparative clarity.

1. Freedom

Sx/Sp's believe in freedom. And they don't just believe in it as an abstract concept, but in reality. They don't want to be held down, confined, restricted, or contained. But then there's the problem of their siren, their drug, their lovean Sx/Sp would sell their soul to merge with their object of desire (be it a person, idea, or whatever). They will tirelessly fight off all other chains placed on them, but they will willingly don the handcuffs binding them to their love. The Sx/Sp ideal is to run away with their love and leave all the world behind.

Sx/So's will not do this. Freedom is too precious to surrender, even to the object of their deepest affection. The Sx/So ideal is not to run away but to stand and fight, tearing down the walls and breaking all chains. Their siren, their drug, their lovethis is the greatest chain of them all. They have a strong desire to merge and yet are compelled to at least put up a token resistance.

2. Means to an End

The Sx/Sp places their hopes for fulfillment of their primary instinct (and ultimately, their survival) in their personal qualities and attributes: attractiveness, charisma, skills, abilities, success, wealth, status, etc. When things don't work out, this can leave an Sx/Sp feeling self-conscious. This gives Sx/Sp's an aire of self absorption and, in some cases, fatalism.

The Sx/So places these hopes in their cunning, cleverness, and ability to make the right choices and decisions. When things don't work out, an Sx/So may wonder what they could have done differently to have more success. This makes Sx/So's come off as enterprising masters of their own destiny.

Let's take seduction as an example: an Sx/Sp focuses on seeming desirable and attractive, an Sx/So focuses on saying the right things and acting the right way.

3. Romantic Relationships

Both Sexual types exhibit a push-and-pull dynamic. The Sx/Sp's version of this is the classic iteration: intense, passionate desire suddenly becomes too intense and Sx/Sp pulls away to protect themselves, only to have the desire return again.

The Sx/So push-and-pull is an internal one: drawn in with some hesitation, drawn closer, maybe pull back a little, still drawn in. It doesn't look as extreme as the Sx/Sp dynamic because the Sx/So doesn't completely surrender to their desire.

As a result, an Sx/Sp is going to be more all-or-none in relationships, either on out on the sand or drowning in the depthspossibly bouncing back-and-forth between the two with the tides. An Sx/So will be more balanced and stable in their relationships, preferring to wade in the shallows.

Additionally, an Sx/So has a much greater problem with partners that seem clingy or smothering. This is encroaches too greatly on their freedom. An Sx/Sp won't have a problem with this in itself (and may even like it); their greater concern is the desirability of their partner. Extreme closeness with a confident and secure partner is Sx/Sp heaven, with an insecure partner it's hell.

Sours: https://www.the16types.info/vbulletin/
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Multiple Enneagram Subtypes/Instincts How to distinguish Sx/Sp and Sx/So?

[MENTION=]Speed Gavroche[/MENTION]

Sx/So vs. Sx/Sp (to the death? :shock:)


Note: These are relative comparisons and they are exaggerated for comparative clarity.



1. Freedom
Sx/Sp's believe in freedom. And they don't just believe in it as an abstract concept, but in reality. They don't want to be held down, confined, restricted, or contained. But then there's the problem of their siren, their drug, their lovean Sx/Sp would sell their soul to merge with their object of desire (be it a person, idea, or whatever). They will tirelessly fight off all other chains placed on them, but they will willingly don the handcuffs binding them to their love. The Sx/Sp ideal is to run away with their love and leave all the world behind.

Sx/So's will not do this. Freedom is too precious to surrender, even to the object of their deepest affection. The Sx/So ideal is not to run away but to stand and fight, tearing down the walls and breaking all chains. Their siren, their drug, their lovethis is the greatest chain of them all. They have a strong desire to merge and yet are compelled to at least put up a token resistance.



2. Means to an End
The Sx/Sp places their hopes for fulfillment of their primary instinct (and ultimately, their survival) in their personal qualities and attributes: attractiveness, charisma, skills, abilities, success, wealth, status, etc. When things don't work out, this can leave an Sx/Sp feeling self-conscious. This gives Sx/Sp's an aire of self absorption and, in some cases, fatalism.

The Sx/So places these hopes in their cunning, cleverness, and ability to make the right choices and decisions. When things don't work out, an Sx/So may wonder what they could have done differently to have more success. This makes Sx/So's come off as enterprising masters of their own destiny.

Let's take seduction as an example: an Sx/Sp focuses on seeming desirable and attractive, an Sx/So focuses on saying the right things and acting the right way.



3. Romantic Relationships
Both Sexual types exhibit a push-and-pull dynamic. The Sx/Sp's version of this is the classic iteration: intense, passionate desire suddenly becomes too intense and Sx/Sp pulls away to protect themselves, only to have the desire return again.

The Sx/So push-and-pull is an internal one: drawn in with some hesitation, drawn closer, maybe pull back a little, still drawn in. It doesn't look as extreme as the Sx/Sp dynamic because the Sx/So doesn't completely surrender to their desire.

As a result, an Sx/Sp is going to be more all-or-none in relationships, either on out on the sand or drowning in the depthspossibly bouncing back-and-forth between the two with the tides. An Sx/So will be more balanced and stable in their relationships, preferring to wade in the shallows.

Additionally, an Sx/So has a much greater problem with partners that seem clingy or smothering. This is encroaches too greatly on their freedom. An Sx/Sp won't have a problem with this in itself (and may even like it); their greater concern is the desirability of their partner. Extreme closeness with a confident and secure partner is Sx/Sp heaven, with an insecure partner it's hell.

Click to expand

Sours: https://www.typologycentral.com/forums/instinctual-subtypes/distinguish-sx-sp-sxhtml
Dark Side of Sx/So (Sexual/Social)

Anonymous asked: sx/sp vs sx/so?

honestly, the two are pretty different just because secondary instinct play a pretty big role in how your dominant instinct manifests itself. 

You try to use your secondary instinct to meet the goal of the first instinct. And if the first instinct’s goal isn’t met, you sorta progress down the latter. So the Sx-doms when stressed sorta follow a different process:

Sx/Sps without a fixation will withdraw immediately, and take care of themselves. They’re typically described as being very in and out or internally conflicted, because they don’t have that aux So tie to the community. If that secondary Sp can’t pull them through to their next connection, though, they’ll start to feel the affects of their So blindspot. Honestly, even in a aux position, So is really guilt trippy so I’d imagine that this phase fucking sucks.

Sx/Sos will sorta have an “in and out” effect too, but instead of physically disappearing they’ll just dissolve into things. They don’t get into self care at that point because So types in general don’t fare well with alone time, so it’s more just group participation. When things go to shit, they get into pseudo-Sp and /then/ they really isolate themselves. The problem with Sp-blinds when they do try and Sp is that they have a very distorted idea of how that works. 

You’ll probably end up finding them under a pile of their own garbage eating nothing but cough drops and essential herbs.

In general though, So-blinds don’t feel any sort of obligation to participate in society unless their blindspot is fucking with them. They don’t place very much value on finding a group and fitting in. They value intense relationships/interests and their own survival first and foremost.

Sx/Sos value their intense relationships and interests first but it’s tainted with So values. (AKA they see themselves as valuable to the group as well). Plus, their commitment to humanity as a whole can give them a bit of a Jesus Christ complex (which can be especially apparent in their writing lmfao). We’re the kind of people who would try and take responsibility for something we only played a small part in, because we don’t want the entire group to get in trouble, but when it comes to taking responsibility for our bills and laundry…….

Sours: https://mbtipartyblog.tumblr.com/post//sxsp-vs-sxso

Vs sp so sx sx

 instinct stacking

 

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Now that the three instinctual drives have been introduced, it is time to look at how all three of them interact within us. We have and require all three drives, but we become over/less identified with specific ones. The “stacking” is referring to which instincts we focus on vs. ignore. All three are in the stacking in levels. 

Dominant Instinct 

The first instinct in our stacking is the dominant one, or the one that we are most focused on. This instinct is so powerful in us that we almost can’t see it. This is similar to the way we need oxygen desperately without being conscious of it or knowing how it works. People can sometimes think that their dominant instinct is their blind spot, because it can be difficult to observe our intrinsic behaviour as being separate from who we are. Also, it just seems so obvious that this stuff is the most important, that it is difficult to imagine NOT focusing on it. This instinct can either be SP, SX, or SO. The large majority of the population dominates with SP, as it is the most basic of survival needs.

Secondary Instinct

The second instinct in our stacking is one that we focus on, but the stakes feel lower when we react to those issues. In can work to either support or antagonize the dominant instinct, where most of our energy is spent. This area is a place we might feel comfortable dipping our feet in without plunging into the deep end, as the dominant instinct pulls focus. This is the instinct that causes us the least problems. The dominant and secondary instinct dually form the general focus of our lives. Nevertheless, this area can be reactive and problematic as well, as it is still an instinctual focus.

The Blind Spot

The third instinct can be as problematic as the first but for a different reason. It is the area that we ignore due to the polar pull of the dominant. This is the area that we feel isn’t crucial or important, and we generally try to meet the aims of this instinct using the strategies of the dominant and secondary instincts. Integrating this instinct can be as challenging as attempting to tame the dominant. It is clumsy and underused. If the more dominant instincts are experiencing some level of satiation momentarily, the blind spot is easier to integrate. On the other hand, the blind spot can be something that we are good at in one small facet because it’s something we don’t worry about. It can also be something that suddenly overwhelms us in situations where our blindness to it becomes an issue. When labelling our stacking, we do not include the blind spot. For example, “SP/SO stacking” refers to dominant SP, secondary SO, and SX blind spot.

There are six instinctual stackings. In order of approximate frequency in the population, they are as follows: SP/SO, SO/SP, SP/SX, SO/SX, SX/SP, and SX/SO. The instinctual focuses are expressed differently depending on the stacking.

nicknames

The following are some nicknames for the stackings that are meant to be broad, abstract archetypes describing the energy focus of each stacking. There are MANY iterations of each stacking and no one person would ever relate to all the nicknames for their stacking. They are highly relative to one's core type/trifix. However, each stacking creates a certain energy in the world, and these nicknames are meant to illustrate how some common themes hold their origin in instinctual stackings.

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SP/SO

The Craftsman, The Innovator, The Inventor, The Curator, The Futurist, The Startup, The Heritage, The Interior Decorator, The Technology, The Preserver, The Adventurer, The Land Explorer, The Traveller, The Lifestyle, The Season

 

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SO/SP

The Leader, The Human Resource, The Activist, The Megaphone, The Cultural Designer, The "Somebody," The Priest, The Teacher, The Birthday, The Pillar, The Monument

 

SP/SX

The Cat, The Spider, The Grime, The Lightening in a Bottle, The Witch, The Haunted House

 

SX/SP

The Vampire, The Transformer, The Fire, The Phoenix, The Electricity, The Veins

 

SO/SX

The Posse, The Nickname, The Sparkler, The Butterfly, The Prince, The Martini, The Fashion, The Icon, The Chit Chat, The BFF

 

SX/SO

The Pop Star, The Soft Diamond, The Sex Therapist, The Provocateur, The Peacock, The God/Goddess, The Immortal, The Solipsistic Sex, The Tango

Secondary instinct

The area of the 2nd instinct acts as a "playground" of sorts in support of the first instinct. We are reactive to the issues of the 2nd instinct, but much less is "at stake" than with the dominant instinct. I'm calling it a playground or play area because we can be more flippant and exhibitionistic in this area. This is because it is neither an ignored blind spot nor an extremely important dominating focus in our lives as is the dominant.

SP playground in SO/SP and SX/SP

  • The body and its wellness as something to toy/experiment with

    • Cutting and distorting the body for the purpose of a social message or sexual display

    • Focus on "group" identities that are concrete such as gender/race/nationality

    • SO/SP turning themselves into a protest instrument"  

    • SX/SP doing SX "vulnerability" by physically transforming their bodies

  • Money and fitness as instruments of the first instinct

    • SO/SP using money or fitness as a point of "status pride"

    • SX/SP using fitness for the purposes of being a sexual object


SO playground in SP/SO and SX/SO

  • Interactions and connections are easy but not particular

    • Adept at communicating and interacting, but not being hyper-particular about who/what/where/when/how

  • Travel and "culture"

    • A focus on travelling and discovering other cultures, less of a concern about establishing a firm identity in one place

    • Culture in general as something that can be discovered in a new place, you can immerse yourself in it, and then leave

  • "People" as an instrument to assist with primary instinct

    • SP/SO making friends and partnered connections for shared resources

    • SX/SO playing with cultural ideas as part of sexual display


SX playground in SP/SX and SO/SX

  • Loud/Accidental sexual display

    • SO/SX particularly flippantly using explicit sexuality as something to toy around with and act as an inviting aspect of their social identity

    • SP/SX accidentally allowing their sexuality to ooze out without much particular control over how

  • The chase without the obsession

    • Being drawn to opening yourself up in a vulnerable way to allow the complete takeover of another being, but then being able to move on to another object without becoming completely immersed like SX-first

  • Injecting "sex" into the primary instinct

    • SP/SX charging the atmosphere/physical environment with an allure

    • SO/SX pushing the glamour and spice of sex into status hierarchies, manifesting as royal themes/crews/nicknames

Blind spot

Sexual Blind Spot - SP/SO and SO/SP

The areas ignored by these two stackings are the three elements of the Sexual instinct:
1. Arousal/Repulsion, 2. Fusion, and 3. Chemistry. 

  1. Arousal/Repulsion: Sexual-blinds are often not as in-tune with what turns them on energetically. They can have strong passions and interests, but the level of whole-self immersion in someone/something is less. The SX-blind stackings are perfectly capable of having enjoyable sex, but this area might be less of a “sacred” place for them. Some SX-blinds will not want to have sex unless they’re in “love” (or feel a social bond), and others are comfortable satisfying their sexual urges as simply a bodily function that’s enjoyable (especially SP/SO). This is contrary to the mating dance that SX-doms play into, the attraction strategy is the things they’re over-identified with, rather than the physical
    “doing it” part. However, all people are capable of enjoying sex (unless asexual). Sometimes SX-blinds are less immediately aware of who’s into them, who’s attracted; it might take them a bit longer to know if they’re completely interested or drawn in. Some SX-blinds can feel basic arousal immediately when attracting a new mate, and some need a bit of time. They often aren’t always aware of what makes them attractive or engaging in a way that hooks people.

  2. Fusion: SX-blinds will attempt to “merge” with people using Social strategies, being more interested in meeting a person where they’re at. There is a stronger sense of reciprocity in the connection, vs. the Sexual connection being somewhat objectifying the other for an energy fix. They will also lack the psychological androgyny of SX-doms in the sense of having a boundary up that blocks their “opening” or “penetrating.” The idea of tossing Social rules aside and allowing yourself to yield to another can feel like “too much.” SX-blinds can feel strongly about another sexually or romantically, but they are not identified with completely losing themselves as a slave to attraction. SX-blinds might focus their attraction strategy on their dominant instinct instead, with SP/SO often assuming that the “body” being fit or thin is the key to attraction, and SO/SP assuming that their social display/affiliations/successes/friendliness is the key to attraction.

  3. Chemistry: SX-blinds will be less aware of energetic chemistry between two people of being magnetically drawn to each other like a moth to a flame. This is something that might be subverted or seen as “intense” or “dangerous” in the psyche. In a way, SX-blinds like to believe that they have some cognitive human power over who they’re attracted to and what they’re drawn to, rather than being a slave to our own animal instincts. The idea that we actually have no choice in the matter of strong attractions is something that is ignored or overridden with Social choice. SX-blinds may try to create chemistry by using “activities” on dates, watching intense movies, drinking alcohol, etc.


The main focus of SP/SO and SO/SP:

  • A focus on survival and society, cooperation as a whole, ideas and systems about how we are all together and how we live, group affiliations, politics, contribution. 

  • Lack of awareness of the body’s own primal urges, the things that make society fall apart, the things that can remove/transform the self, the narcotic within

  • can lead to a fear of one-on-one or overly personalized interactions, groups are safer because there’s less onus on you to be interesting

  • state of the earth, climate, objects, things that are concrete and manmade, social monuments

  • Innovation for humanity, building structures for the people, focused on things that will last, monuments 

  • Outsource SX to movies, art, substances, vicarious SX



Social blind spot - SP/SX and SX/SP

The area that is ignored by these three stackings are the three elements of the Social instinct: 1. Connection/Care, 2. Mindreading, 3. Harmony/Role.

  1. Connection/Care: The connections made by the sexual instinct do not involve bonding or reciprocity. This is not to say that they can’t feel love, but the instinctual drive itself is more concerned with connecting chemically as if getting a drug fix, and maintaining that locked-in high. They can make friendship bonds or other types of relationships with people, but they are often less “close” than it seems. Once the energy of attraction wears off, they might forget to maintain that bond as they search for a new energy fix. They also have less of a “screening process” for the people they interact with. SO has a sense of “good and bad people” built in, or an innate sense of knowing who has the same moral values or psychological understanding of the world. These similarities will bond them together. SO-blinds often ignore this, and the people in their life are less of a “big deal” or of something that needs to be focused on.

  2. Mindreading: SO-blinds are often unaware of certain social cues, or they might ignore them without even intending to rebel against them. The big societal lattice-work of mental mindreading is muted in favour of SP and SX. They may create beautiful art or have great ideas, but they often lack the superb communication skills of a SO-dom who is highly aware of how everything they do is received by others, and is able to respond to their social cues. Lacking this arena of social has behavioural similarities to autism, but is not the same thing.

  3. Harmony/Role: SO-blinds forget to present a sense of “me” and identity beyond being an attraction object for themselves or others. They are less concerned with how others see them and how they fit into the greater context of society or even their own small circle. In a sense, they lack a “genre,” the SO-doms having the clearest sense of this. They will take little pride in being part of any team, being from a particular city/place, having a “crew” or group, etc.


The main facets of SP/SX and SX/SP:

  • A focus on the self and its needs, the objectifying of others for sex/arousal or instinctual resources

  • Lack of focus how to present themselves in a way that properly communicates their own message of who they are 

  • Lack of awareness of what makes them bonded to others, who they are in relation to others, how they are relating to others reciprocally

  • Not being “met,” no communication just for the sake of talking, not looking to connect on something shared, may connect on something but do not identify with the space between two people that the connection brings, they are not bonded by communication 

  • Lacking a sense of social order (Socials can rebel against order but it’s deliberate), and a sense of being “civilized” or “human”

  • Outsource social to others, have other people keep them in the loop



Self-Preservation Blind Spot - SO/SX and SX/SO

The area that is ignored by these stackings are the three elements of Self-Preservation: 1. Well-Being, 2. Self-Regulation, and 3. Resources/Foundations.

  1. Physical Well-Being: SP-blinds can have a deep belief that they will survive no matter what. They may cognitively know that they are mortal and susceptible to harm, but there’s an immaturity around accepting that their body is a physical vessel and not “them.” SP-doms know that the body is completely fragile and that their living consciousness depends on protecting it at all costs. SP-blinds find crafty ways of ignoring that basic survival fact. They might have no problem pleasuring their body with food/sex, etc. But there’s a difference between focusing on the body’s pleasure and actually taking care of it. Some SP-doms take care of their body by testing its limits, and strengthening it. SP-blinds are out of touch with this need to preserve their own health. They are less fazed by illness or injuries; either that or are completely shocked and stressed that their bodies would fail them and suddenly stressed by the idea of having to consider it. Nobody is particularly excited about illness, but there’s a sense of inevitability around the idea of illness that is lost with SP-blinds. On another level, SP being the most crucial instinct, SP-blinds often find ways to take care of it so they don’t have to experience the extreme anxiety of thinking about it. They might set up structures that allow them to coast around it. For example, both a SP-dom and a SP-blind might sell their soul for a boring government job to gain security. The SP-dom wants the security because they feel it’s safest. The SP-blind knows that they don’t have the necessary survival skills to exist without a safety net and thinks this is the easiest way to ignore that facet of life. It’s worth mentioning the opposite scenario because instinct is complicated. The SP-dom might avoid that boring job because they actually feel equipped to survive something more challenging. And the SP-blind might avoid that secure job because they have the toddler style of SP-blind where they just don’t think about it at all. Motivation is key.

  2. Self-Regulation and Skills: SP-blinds view all this stuff as “boring and unimportant.” Many SP-doms enjoy cultivating particular hands-on skills, and others see these responsibilities as boring as well. However, with SP-blinds, they often lack the ability to build things piece-by-piece long-term and the hard work it takes to get results is blind to them.

  3. Resources and Foundations: SP-blinds can often not make the connection between work and money. Some SP-blinds like 3’s for example will work very hard and in turn make a lot of money. But there’s still a blind spot between toil and monetary reward. The idea of securing oneself is ignored. They are the opposite of a business person. This is not to say they can’t be rich or successful in business, but building foundations for themselves long-term is something that doesn’t seem important. SP-blinds are the least likely to be hoarders, or just accumulate “stuff” in general. There’s a blindness around physicality of objects and bodies.


The main facets of SO/SX and SX/SO:

  • A focus on people, lots of display from both SX and SO, showing their colours, who they are, what they’re into, open, overly personal, one intense connection at a time

  • Lack of awareness of what people actually need to survive, irresponsible, “It’ll all work out, who cares.”

  • Want influence, Social realm is toyed with playfully 

  • Not good at regulating themselves, may have strong sensation, but unable to regulate, Considering health on a daily basis is exhausting, ex. Healthy eating, working out, making money; may feel a strong impulse to just ignore this or want is all done for them

  • There’s a sense of care-free attitude, since SP-blinds don’t worry about all that “important stuff,” and in a way it may seem like they just get whatever they want in life without trying or considering the hard work it takes to get it

  • SP-blinds might delegate SP to others, knowing in the back of their minds that someone will take care of their well-being, acquire the practical skills they need, and perhaps be their financial safety net

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Is that a virgin from some Muslim family. - Buy. - The member began to gain strength again, moved after Rachel's hand. - And what should I do with her.

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Alik at this time went into the kitchen, and when he came back, he calmly went to his couch. Nicky's disappointment was heard in the phrase: - So you were joking about joining. - Do you need it. - asked Alik.



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